Wednesday, October 13, 2010

THE BLOG OF A SOPHISTICATED YOUNG PUBLISHING PROFESSIONAL IN NEW YORK CITY

As you can see, there's been some changes around here. No more of that pink/white bubblegum layout--pshaw, how old do you think I am, twenty-two?!--now instead, there is only black. Like the color of the New York city skyline. My cashmere sweater. My soul.

Yes. There will be no more lulz or talk of balls and skankalanks. Like my game face, this blog needs to exude professional, something like, "Dahhlin', if you sign with me, I'll get you a 9-figure book deal before I even sip my midday martini [haughty laughter here]." I'd do a hairflip too, if it weren't tied back in a face-pulling bun.

Obviously, there will be no more giggling, only bored amusement. If you must, however, show anything other than ennui, you may snap your fingers. Once.

Nevertheless, the transformation is not yet complete. The following is the status of the requisite steps to becoming...

MS. HARDASS POWERAGENT

[x] Subscribe to the New York Times
[x] Subscribe to The New Yorker
[x] Wear black leather skirt
[x] Wear black leather boots
[pending] Buy black scarf
[pending] Carry caffeinated beverage at all times
[pending] Order interns to buy me said caffeinated beverage
[pending] Adopt British or old money accent
[pending] Eat less, drink more

That's all for now, my dear. I'll let you know how this goes *kiss kiss*

-jude Judith Eng...Eng...err, Engle. Judith Engle III.

10 comments:

Talei October 13, 2010 at 6:40 PM  

Dear Ms. Hardass Poweragent,

Is your soul truly black?

Yours,
Musing Scribe xox

Candyland October 13, 2010 at 7:49 PM  

Um...NO more talk of balls?
*searches for a new topic*
*draws a blank*

Kate Hart October 13, 2010 at 8:43 PM  

I am adding "skankalank" to my lexicon posthaste.

Anthony October 13, 2010 at 10:04 PM  

I LOLed I sure did.

Meredith Barnes October 13, 2010 at 10:31 PM  

While I don't think it precludes you from making pre-martini-9-figure deals, I have it on good authority that your soul is bubblegum pink.

Sharon K. Mayhew October 13, 2010 at 11:59 PM  

You'll need a Channel jacket, Darling.

(Love the new posh look!)

adam.purple October 14, 2010 at 9:30 AM  

[finger snap]

Christina Lee October 14, 2010 at 9:39 AM  

black cashmere sweaters and black souls go very well together *wink*

Shelley Watters October 14, 2010 at 3:49 PM  

Omg you're so funny. Great post. Looking forward to the official one dahhling!

Jackee October 14, 2010 at 11:14 PM  

LOL! But skankalank is such a fun word. :o)

Sorry, but I'm totally picturing Sandra Bullock in The Proposal.

~ Jackee